Out of sorts

I've been feeling very "off" for the last several weeks, and I'm not sure why. Before that I was enjoying a few months of relatively good health: hardly any headaches/migraines, energetic, happy, no stomach issues, etc. But now I'm the opposite, except perhaps the happy part, although the poor health is affecting my attitude the longer it goes on. I can't attribute it to anything in particular, and I'm baffled as to what to do about it.

The migraines scare me, because they've been relatively rare since last September after I went off the pill. When I was on the pill, I suffered from 10-15 migraines a month (!), many quite severe, more so than I had been used to. But once I stopped taking the pill, the number dropped to 1-3 a month, if that. So for them to start up during the last several weeks for no reason—and to be increasing slowly from week to week—scares and depresses me.

My stomach has also been in turmoil, even though I'm eating the same things, or less of them. I can understand the energy going downhill because of the migraines and stomach problems, but it's still frustrating. My current physical state is making me not want to take pictures, draw and paint, laugh with friends, go out and about, and other such activities. It's making me crabby.

I'm not sure what's going on, but I hope for it all to end soon, so I can go back to feeling fantastic, like I have been since being laid off (ha ha, how ironic).

Craving a Quarter Pounder (with cheese)

I have been bravely resisting all week, eating healthy stuff like healthy soups, lightweight salads, and lean turkey sandwiches on whole wheat bread. But the siren call of the grease, salt, and fat is getting stronger and stronger. I've been trying to avoid giving in, because it's obviously horrible for you AND I should be saving that $6 or so, right? And it's red meat, for crying out loud! That stuff does NOT agree with me most days. And you would think my refusal to wear anything but flowy peasant tops because of my currently jibbly-jabbly midsection would convince me to eat healthy and get back on the treadmill, but it's not. I'm not sure why I must have one, but I'm on the verge of getting in the car and going to McDonald's. Like right. about. now.



Oh, and some of these, please? Steaming hot...oh yeah.

UPDATE: I gave in, and it was well worth the $5.49 I spent.

(images by toyohara and groteski)

Scratchy pipes

My sure-fire way for dealing with the onset of something cold-like...

Aspirin (maybe not THIS many though, ha ha)



Chloraseptic, nectar of the pain relief gods



Bigelow Cozy Chamomile tea, which I normally drink by the bucket-full anyhow



Sweet, sweet Ricola throat drops (ahhhh!)—although I have a hard time not chewing them because they get this nice, gummy-crunchy texture that's irresistable



And my secret weapon while sick at work, Diet Pepsi—or Diet Coke, coffee, whatever has caffeine in it and keeps me going until I can stumble out to my car and drive home in a cold-induced haze



I haven't been feeling well for the last few days, hence my absence from blogland. Today has been the worst of it so far. Nice scratchy sore throat, headache, chills, achy everywhere...I sure hope I don't develop a full-blown cold. I feel like I'm teetering on the edge though. Whenever the weather is as dramatic as it has been here—it's been as low as 5 at one point, then 60s a few days later—I tend to come down with fun things like this. But I'm fighting it, and maybe eating healthier/working out for the last few weeks will help my immunity?

I hope you're all doing well, and not suffering from sniffles and such! And I'm sure I will be back to reading my favorite blogs in no time.

So blah

Today I woke up tired, but okay. I ate my usual Cheerios—sharing them, of course, with the dogs—and went upstairs to take a shower. When I was getting out, I started feeling super queasy, which I found odd. The feeling passed and I left for work soon after.

On my way to work, I stopped for my daily coffee from the local Philips (only 86 cents!). After a few sips I started having bad stomach pains, but not like digestive pains or anything. More like my stomach muscles were really tight and contracted, and my stomach just hurt. I couldn't figure out what was wrong. I hadn't been eating anything weird lately. Heck, I haven't been eating anything lately period, thanks to a lovely thing called a diet (I'm still majorly loving Lose It!, by the way). I did have a salad...maybe my body was rejecting the first large helping of healthy vegetables I had consumed in weeks?

Needless to say, I felt like crap most of the day, and even tonight, while I was on the treadmill doing a gentle but brisk walk. What is up with my body? I can lay in an isolation booth for a month, eating nothing but carefully measured and selected meals, and I will STILL develop some sort of stomach, head, body, mouth, or any other kind of pain imaginable. It's days like these when I feel like giving up the good fight and just grabbing that bag of Doritos out of the pantry. I'm puffy and feel uncomfortable in my own skin, much of that caused by whatever bug or food is passing through me.

But I always stop myself short, and instead turn to other things as a distraction. Sleep is a good one because it's not only beneficial, but I can just fast forward to the end of the day and start all over in the morning with a clean slate. Television can be a nice way to zone out and forget what's bugging me, but I often get stuck watching something dull on the Military Channel with Pete. That's a bit too much zoning out for my tastes.

And then, of course, there's blogging. If I want to pour my feelings out, relate a funny story, or share some cool pix, that's the route to go. And here I am, writing this while my stomach continues to cramp, my husband snores away on the couch, and I find myself wishing it were 10:00 so I could justify going to bed right away. (It's only 8:15. Damn.)

After having several good, amazing days where I felt pretty healthy, was energetic, and happy, these kind of days hit me like a ton of bricks. What to do in such a situation? Get up, shake myself off, and move on, I suppose. At least my diet is benefiting from my lack of food desire...

Lose It! for iPhone

I've discovered this crazy-wonderful new app for iPhone called Lose It! If you are trying to lose weight and have had trouble doing so, this app is for you. Not only does it do an awesome job at tracking what you eat, how much you exercise, how much you weigh, and your weight loss goals, but it's FREE!



I've just started using it and I'm already thrilled with the results. It's easy to use, and it does away with keeping track the old way—calories scribbled on pads of paper, trying to figure out how much you ate, how much you worked out, and how it's all affecting your weight loss. I didn't realize how much I had been eating, which has probably been sabotaging my weight loss program so far. With Lose It! I've been able to track EVERYTHING and it's all at the palm of my hand.



Seriously, this thing rocks. And again, it's FREE! Check it out.

The marvels of modern dentistry

My head is still spinning from how fast I had my cavities filled today at the dentist. I wasn't in the chair more than 15 minutes before I was being cleaned up and sent on my merry way. They have sure come a long way since the days of painful shots, whining drills, and lots of cotton jammed in the mouth. I must say that the pain afterward hasn't changed all that much, but maybe I'm just being a baby. It's been so long since I've had a cavity or anything of that nature, so I suppose I've forgotten what it's like.

At any rate, I'm headed to bed shortly to get some rest. My mouth hurts, and my furry children are being especially annoying and persistent tonight, for which I have little patience. I missed out on reading most of my favorite blogs, but I'll be back tomorrow night when I'm feeling a little better. Ant thanks to everyone who left words of comfort and encouragement regarding my impending layoff, I really appreciate it.

Finally wore 'em

I ordered these boots well over a month or two ago after receiving a gift card for DSW from a friend. So you would think I'd have worn them to death by now, right? Heck no. Why? I think it's because I've sunk back into that funk of mine as far as appearance goes, and only when I go to work. I mean, I wore the boots to Pete's dinner and party last night, and dressed up a bit, but come Monday I'll have a hard time convincing myself I should wear them to work. I got lots of compliments on them, but I'm not sure that will be enough for me to bring them back out again.

I wish I could work up the will to wear these lovelies, as well as all the other pretty stuff in my closet, but I've retreated into a pattern of comfort and minimal effort. I think it's partly because I'm more and more (and more) unhappy at work and don't feel like making the effort, but also because I've slid quite a bit in my fitness routine during the last few months. Essentially I have NO fitness routine since becoming sick back in December, when I was in the height of health, working out, and feeling better about myself.

It's been hard to get back into that grove, and I'm wondering what will give me that push back onto the treadmill, even if to just walk a little. Perhaps warmer weather, or just the itch to get back into a healthy routine. Whatever it may be, I know I'll be back at that point soon, because it's been on my mind a lot lately and my clothes have become rather ill fitting. If that's not a motivating factor, I don't know what is.

Grant me immunity

I'm not sure what to do anymore. I consider myself a person who follows a fairly healthy lifestyle. I don't smoke, I drink only once in a while, I eat well, I get some exercise and sleep (both areas I'm trying to improve), I take my vitamins and I'm in a healthy, loving relationship (with Pete AND my pets). I eat lots of fresh foods, salads, organics, I go easy on dressings and other things (butter, creams, spreads, etc.) and I try to stay away from red meat and other problematic foods.



But as you may have noticed, my immune system seems to have given up, and I'm constantly getting colds or feeling under the weather (like now). My skin is horribly broken out (has been since our honeymoon) and I'm constantly suffering from weird aches and pains. My stomach is always a mess and I am forever having trouble coexisting with certain foods. I'm always dead tired and hurting, and as a result, I'm crabby, moody, and sullen. I don't want to do anything that requires great physical effort because I just can't muster up the energy. So what gives?



Yes, my Hooveritis* has much to do with it, I suppose. I've noticed a general demise in my overall health since it began almost two years ago. It tends to act up during the colder months, too. But I get regular massages and have been working out to help keep flexible and loose. And yes, I've always been plagued by headaches and migraines, especially during the last several years, but I've been careful to avoid triggers like red wine and try to get plenty of sleep (I try). Of course I have a very stressful job, and times are tough, but that's been the case in past years and have never been so sickly like this. I wake up every day feeling like I'm 85, not 35. What am I doing wrong?



Have you been having trouble with your health? What kinds of problems do you have? What do you do to feel better? Do you work out, eat right, sleep well, take vitamins, etc., or do you have another regimen you follow? I'm curious to know, because although I am taking steps to get healthier, not much seems to be changing. It's almost scary. No, it IS scary!

One POSITIVE change though: Claire has so helpfully suggested that I take Lysine for my canker sores. Since I started taking it several weeks ago, I have not had a single recurrence, which is utterly remarkable to me. So thank you, Claire! Every little bit helps.



Anyhow, I hope you are feeling great, healthy, happy, energetic, and well rested wherever you are and whatever you're doing, and I hope you are dodging those winter bugs so far too!


*Undiagnosed nerve disorder/injury that causes pain, lethargy, swollen lymph nodes, exhaustion

Dietary detective

Sigh...

Well, I'm sloooowly figuring out what I can and can't eat. And this is all by trial and error, which is unfortunate, but it's the only way I can see which foods don't like me. I've noticed trends in reactions to certain foods and I've learned to start avoiding them (or adding them if the reactions are good).

Like red meat. Boy, do I love red meat. I would say I'm a borderline vegetarian wannabe (I hate the thought of eating animals), but red meat lures me back all the time. But for the last several years, it hasn't been too kind to my digestive system. That steak I ate this weekend at my inlaws' home? Ugh, I don't even want to go into what happened for the next few days after eating it. And you would think I'd realize this right away, but I haven't. I always chalked up my stomach issues to a bad cut of meat, or that I was just not feeling well in general, etc. More and more often, however, I've noticed this isn't the case, and unless I eat a tiny amount of red meat once in a while, the stuff always messes with me and I feel sick for a day or so as it works its way through my digestive system.



Same thing with stuff like orange juice, salt, coffee, ice cream (sob!), some cheeses, spicy foods... And on the same token, I have found out what my body loves, most recently during a "cleansing" diet during the summer in which I ate nothing but fish, chicken, rice products, fruits and veggies, and herbal tea. Let me tell you, my body was in heaven. It especially seems fond of rice products, which is good, because I find them pretty tasty. And I love stuff like sushi, fresh fruit, chamomile tea and cream, chicken, etc. But a girl does tire of healthy stuff after a while, and of course I succumb to the evils of fried and fatty foods. And what happens? The ill health (headaches, upset stomach, general malaise) comes back with a vengeance. Funny that candy never seems to bother me, unless I eat several pounds of it during the course of the day (not that I've ever done that, ahem). I do adore the stuff and must restrain myself at all times. And I'm sure someday my teeth will just give up and wearily fall out of my head anyhow, rotten to the core and waving little white flags.



I just woke up with yet another killer headache, which is similar to the one I got on Saturday morning after having lots of salty foods on Friday. And what did I have last night? Lots of salty foods (pretzels, baked fries, baked chips). No matter how much water I drink, I seem to wake up with borderline migraines (or full-blown migraines) if I eat too much salt the night before. Which is really, really sad, just like red meat, because I LOVE salty foods. But they don't love me, and I really need to start saying no to the delicious stuff.



Do you have any dietary problems you've been able to identify? Do you find certain foods leave your body happy? I'm curious to hear all about it.

(Photos courtesy of Chewing the Cud, NYMag, Black Tomato, Lifehack)

Run, Chris, Run

Well, I did it! And I surprised myself. I was toying with the idea of at least walking on the treadmill tonight, but not necessarily running. I figured I'd mix a little burst of speed into my walk here and there, but otherwise just do a brisk walk.

All that changed once I got on the treadmill, however. For some reason I just had the urge to run, maybe because I wasn't able to on Sunday, and because I've been absolutely itching to do so for a while now. And I kept up a pretty good pace for a long time, until the last five minutes or so, when I started to get really tired. I'd say I did almost 30 minutes of straight running, which was about two miles at my pace. Not too shabby for someone who hasn't run at all since late July, and who has been eating cheeseburgers and fries and candy and cookies for the last few months. That kind of eating is something I used to rarely do, but for some reason I gave myself the green light one I was back from my honeymoon to go crazy on the snarfing.

Anyhow, I wanted to share my news with you all, and I've been very touched by your words of encouragement and kindness. And to those of you out there who are thinking of doing the same thing, or struggling with your current exercise or diet program, don't despair. Give me a shout and we can chat about it if you want. I've been there and back so many times my head spins when I think about it. I used to be over 50 pounds overweight back when I was 18, and I dropped all that weight and have kept (most of) it off since then, which hasn't been too hard. So struggling for the last few years with my weight has been difficult and discouraging, but every so often I get motivated, and I try to run with that (ha ha). So seriously, if I can help you the way you've helped me, just let me know.

And now that I've showered and I'm all clean, I'm getting sleepy, so I'd best be bloggin' before I conk out!

Photo of the Week: "It's Time"

I was at the doctor yesterday and found out that not only is my blood pressure really high, but I've gained a total of 20 pounds over the last four years. Not good, not good at all. That actually has scared me into changing my ways, especially having high blood pressure, which I don't normally have.

So I'm reuniting with these old friends of mine, my New Balance 805 running shoes. Well-loved and well-worn, they have carried me through many a run, whether outside in the forest preserve or in my basement on our old treadmill. They helped me get in shape for my wedding this summer, and now they're ready to help me do it again. They've been patiently waiting for me to wear them again, and now I'm back. Yay!

It's time to get back on the treadmill, sidewalks, paths, and get back into shape. Time to get healthy and watch what I eat, take care of myself, and rediscover my formerly healthy body. I miss it so much, too. I miss feeling healthy and good every day, I miss feeling energetic, I miss being shapely and fitting in all my clothes, and I miss the good feeling I get from taking care of myself. I just miss feeling at the top of my game and feeling good about my body, and I've let things get to this point, so it's my fault. So I'm going to be the one to make it right and make the change. And that change starts with these shoes. My first run is scheduled for Sunday morning, but I'll definitely be doing some walking before then.

And in the spirit of being healthier, I'm going to take a breather tonight (Thursday) and hit the hay early. I've been up since 3:10 a.m. because I had to drive to Pete to work early, and I'm tired and achy and just plain run down. So I'm going to abstain from blogging tonight (including reading all my favorite blogs, boo hoo!) and get some rest.

I'll see you all tomorrow!